We all have our inner dialogue to construct our narrative for us. I have always found the vocabulary of that connection fascinating. How we understand it and materialize it is how we make sense of the world
My writing is a way to transcribe that vocabulary and an attempt to vocalize a dialogue that houses a conversation much larger than itself.
Grab me from behind, endure my existence. Twist around me like a snake, blur my presence. Take me away from here, from this world, from my memories, from my friends and my family but most importantly, take me away from me. Kidnap me from my conscience and give me away to the dark. Give me away to a place known by many but seen by few, sell me to the lords of that realm. Let me grow as someone I have never grown before. Change my reality. I’m stuck between my dreams and reality. I’m nostalgic about my future. I’m in love with what I’m not and despise who I am. Am I right or wrong? What is right and wrong? Who decides? Religion? Society? Parents? Elderly? Fuck the elderly! Fuck the society. Let’s let go and sit down. Relax. Talk to our conscience. Revisit the merits of friendship, humour, loyalty, love, relationships.
Resonance
Chakra
Little is left of me. Most is what you’ll leave behind. And then hopefully, I’ll be lost. The child would have grown and the dream would have gone. You’ll be gone and I’ll be forgotten as ‘we’ are left to rot like an old box of unused toys somewhere in the attic covered with dust and filled with remorse but hope is for tomorrow. As we shall unite, you and I…
I reach out and look for you. Are you there? Still sleeping I see. Still breathing. Are you numb still? Tell me tho, can you feel what’s going on around? These silly little things. These needless affairs. Are you aware? Can you still see? Can you see how you’re not your flesh and bones? Do you see how music and art is this little sneak peek into the soul? Do you see how forgetful you are? Do you forget what gifts you have? You have nothing that holds you and yet you stay where you are. Is it because you don’t believe or because you don’t know? Have you asked yourself? Stop for a moment. Open your eyes, take a peek of what’s there. Maybe you’ll like it.
Friends in Minds
You're Beautiful
Inside out you’re beautiful You’re beautiful inside your body and outside You’re beautiful with your clothes and without You’re strong inside the room and out You’re wonderful inside this relationship and outside You’re amazing in being you. You’re kinda cool You’re beautiful when you make that face when you cut your nails. You’re beautiful when you read your book, You’re beautiful when you sing along terribly to your favourite songs. You’re beautiful when you sip on that hot cup of chai You’re beautiful in all of you You’re beautiful in being you
Everything went dark as I danced to the tune in my head. It was dark and it was silent, the silence before the storm kind. Too quiet. A ray of light coming from the half open bathroom door. The song synchronised with the drop of water ricocheting the silver in the sink. Just the drop and my feet dragging through the ground. Me and the noises in my head. I was alone but after a very long time, I wasn’t lonely. What was it?
Blue Dream
Blue Dream II
It’s hazy and cold. It’s surreal and beautiful. It’s soft and quiet. It’s peaceful. It’s blue and too good to be true. I must have forgotten. I must have slept. I must be dreaming. I shouldn’t wake up. I should not stop. I will not stop. I will continue. Dreams are realities under construction and I’m building mine. One brick at a time, one picture at a time. I grow and one day I will glow. To be forgotten in an instance and to be remembered forever. When I become your dream and make a small home in your conscience
There’s a void that exists between what we know and how we feel. I could tell you where I was but not how my weight felt against the ground, what I wore but not how the fabric felt against my skin, what I had eaten a while ago but not the taste in my mouth. How cold the air felt, not in the temperature but the intensity of my shivers. I couldn’t tell you how lonely I was until she arrived. I could tell you it was 15 minutes but I couldn’t tell you how long those 15 minutes were. I could see there were 8 people but couldn’t fathom the aura in words. My comfort or discomfort. The essence of my existence or how fragile and temporary it all felt. How MY reality narrated my emotions. We think language liberates us. I say words restrict us. We live between the gap of what we can say and how we actually feel. The expression of self and the narration of feelings. The leap of uncertainty. It’s in this land of nowhere, this realm of subconsciousness that I meet you. Where we have a conversation of all that’s important and all that’s not. Where we consciously forget for a while what we’ve become and what we couldn’t be. And in the absence of who we wanted to be we forgive ourselves. We move on from the merits we let ourselves get defined by. We don’t let our goals haunt us anymore. We just be happy and we just be. Where we talk without meeting or knowing each other and where we truly find who we are. Who I am and who you are. It’s the resonance of you and me that can’t be put in words but be felt in the metaphors of visuals and sounds. A language without grammar, words without alphabets and a world without sadness. It could be true if you believe it to be. Let’s talk?
The Silent Conversations
Friends in Thoughts
Has it been hurting? The secret fights you’ve had yourself. The challenges and the battles of survival? Have you been losing? It’s okay. We lose to win. The night is always the darkest before dawn so relax. Cut yourself some slack. You’ve been at it pretty hard and you’ve been doing a good job! Don’t let anyone else tell you differently. Sing songs, dance, express yourself your happiness! Your sadness, your disappointments and remember your hopes. You’re amazing! Look at what you’ve achieved, all that you’ve gained. All the distance that you’ve travelled. Where you are, how far you’ve come. Where you were! It might be a while before you get where you want to but enjoy the road there. It’s more about the journey then it’s about the destination. Stop for a second. Look out and look within. See these marvels of your existence. And remember nothing compares to you! Be free and be you
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